Monday, December 22, 2008

What I Learned Last Night (A Lesson in Stupidity)

As Mitch and I were driving home from the Seahawks game last night, we witnessed a pretty bad wreck on the Redmond-Fall City Highway. In fact, we narrowly missed being in the accident ourselves (I'm talking a matter of feet and milliseconds here). Mitch called in the accident, and we ended up out in the snow for a couple hours directing traffic, waiting for the State Patrol, and filing witness reports. Fortunately nobody was seriously hurt. I will sum up the story with a list of things I learned, in chronological order, thanks to the "driver at fault":

1. If it is snowing, don't drive.

2. If you do choose to drive in the snow, make sure you're sober.

3. If you choose to drive in the snow drunk, make sure you're not driving a VW Rabbit.

4. If you choose to drive your VW Rabbit in the snow drunk, make sure you don't get into an accident. You will lose to a Ford Explorer.

5. If you get hit by a Ford Explorer in your VW Rabbit while driving in the snow drunk, make sure you don't leave the scene of the accident.

6. If you leave the scene of the accident (which you lost after driving your VW in the snow drunk), and you choose to dive into the bushes to hide, make sure they're not blackberry bushes.

7. If you drive your VW Rabbit in the snow drunk, get destroyed by a Ford Explorer, and leave the scene of the accident by running down a private drive and jumping into the blackberry bushes, make sure you're wearing more than a sweatshirt and jeans.

1 comment:

Nicole Kristine said...

I thought this was hilarious. I read it out loud to Carolyn Hann. She also thought it was hilarious.